Our Kids

Every year that we have been blessed to spend Thanksgiving holiday with my in laws I always ask to bring something, Kathie makes such a big spread and she never needs anything. But this year I am SOOO thankful that I did not have to, need to or even want to bring anything:) It was such a relief with all I have going on to not to have to worry about today.

As always it was a fantastic spread, excellent company and I am stuffed to the gills. The girls had such a great time and we are all spent. So to all of you out there I hope you had a great day, just like we did.

First of all I have to say that I have been spoiled. Piper and Lela have never been those kids that get in to or do things you would rather them not like cut your curtains, color on your walls, put stuff in your toilets etc. So they have some privileges that might be above their level. I still keep the scissors put away but they have access to all their markers etc. Having said that this luxury has allowed me not to have locks on any of my cabinets and such.

This morning I decided to be delightfully decadent and have them brush their teeth (they brush on their own in the AM and we brush them in the PM) while I blow dried my hair instead of air dry. Well imagine my surprise (and shock) when I arrived in their bathroom to the two of them up on the counter top with scissors in their hands (one for trimming hair and the other was that one that comes with the baby nail care kit) and hair scattered all around them. Gah! I was not happy. For the first time in their lives I sent them to their beds so I could regain my composure. I was so upset. Not so much about their hair but that they would get the scissors out. I took some time and cleaned the counter tops in the kitchen before going to their room and talking to them. I got down on their level and told them that I was very hurt that they would do something so unsafe. I explained to them that it wasn’t safe and asked if they knew that.

This is where my lesson really started. Piper is very much motivated by words, she is also hurt by words, Lela is more in to things. So my talk visibly upset Piper and Lela was skipping away happy as a clam. I had another talk with Piper about safety and how much I loved her and that I wanted her to be safe and what could have happened if she had fallen with those scissors. Lela is not phased a bit about the whole thing. I am making sure that they both know I love them even when they do things that make me upset.

I am over it, Lela is way over it and I am making sure that Piper knows she is loved no matter what so she can be over it too.

My lesson was how differently they take discipline and if I want it to be effective I have to remember that they are separate beings with different motivators even though they are the same age.

I don’t think they will do it again and I might have to have one cabinet with a child lock……change, I don’t like it:)

We had a great afternoon (post ear bursting, doctor visit, prescription filling). We went to have a playdate with Kate and Elle, Kate goes to school with the girls and she has a younger sister just about Landis age. The girls LOVE Kate and have been begging me for a playdate, so much so Lela was in tears when I told her I thought we should postpone so we went.

They had the best time, and it was super awesome for me too. The girls all get along so well together that I was actually able to sit and chat with their mom (an amazing photographer that I am so happy to have met) for almost 3 hours. Talk about bliss. Throw in a cup of coffee and a scone and I might not have ever left. LOL!

Another bonus is that Michele grabbed her camera and snapped a couple pics of the girls. You can check them out over at her blog by clicking here.

Thanks for an awesome playdate:)

So this morning Lela said her ear stopped hurting, turns out it was because it burst again. The same ear. It is so funny/ironic because this kid doesn’t even know how to blow her nose because it NEVER RUNS! Piper is a pro and even Landis can blow their noses because they always run. Gah! So why does a virus turn in to an ear infection for Lela so often? We might see an ENT and just see if her tubes are tilted or smaller or what not, first things first though we have to kill this infection. Poor thing her ear has been literally dripping all day, it is gross. Piper and Lela are funny though, here is a conversation they had in the car today:

Piper: Lela your ear is dripping
Lela: It is? Mom, my ear is dripping (mom chucks back a wet wipe, Lela cleans her ear)
Lela: Piper you will have to tell me if my ear is dripping because I can’t see it.
Piper: Okay
Lela: Is it dripping?
Piper: No

They were cracking me up being the others eyes and ears:) The good news is that as long as we keep the fever down she feels fine. We were able to talk to the doctor about a different antibiotic that she has to take only once a day. She gets herself so worked up that she vomits or is an absolute wreck with heaps of crying before the meds get in. This time I let her choose between 3 shots (on different occasions) and the once a day antibiotic. She chose the once a day and was a real champ about taking it. We are back at the doctor a week from Monday for Landis to have her ears checked again so we will check out Lela and go from there.

To have gone so long without illness and then to get slammed really puts it all in to perspective:)

This afternoon Lela starting saying her ear hurt and then she started to cry. I am sure she is remembering her bloody burst eardrum from a few weeks ago and is scared. So I dosed her with Children’s Motrin and braced myself for the long night ahead, I also called the doctor and made an appt for tomorrow AM. Check and Check. Then we went about our normal evening routine with dinner, clean up, jammies, book reading and teeth brushing.

I had washed the girls blankets so I got them out and they were nice and warm (Piper loves this) and put the girls in their beds with snuggly blankets. Then I took Landis on the front porch and rocked her while talking with Jason. Finally Jason got a chill and we headed inside to my shock and surprise Piper was FAST ASLEEP! After my ranting from the other night who the heck knows why tonight of all nights she went to bed with NO DRAMA! Gah! Did I mention she needs manual? Anyhoo, Lela was sitting on the sofa just waiting for us. I put her to bed in our room in her toddler bed and she has been sleeping for the last few hours, hopefully it will continue and we can get to the doctor before her ear really starts to hurt.

We just can’t seem to catch a break with these darn viruses.

Well little Phoebe is happy as a clam in my big ol’ belly but I seem to have misplaced my belly button:) I think it is actually the one part that makes Jason uncomfortable, my big belly with no belly button:) LOL! Good thing I never got that belly tattoo back in the day I can only imagine what it would be looking like…SCARY! The girls pediatrician (whom we saw this week with yet another double ear infection for Landis, poor child) thought I was maybe 4 months along and not 7! I tell ya I feel more like 9. All is well here with me, Phoebe, the girls and even Landis despite her ears.

I dunno why we can’t get something going right for Piper at bedtime. It is the same thing over and over and over it is the definition of insanity! I feel like we have tried everything and frankly it is exhausting. Once she goes to sleep she is fine but getting her to relax and go to bed is fruitless, it is like it always has to end in some sort of emotional breakdown (either ours or hers). Gah….why don’t they come with manuals:)

At a recent homeschool conference I went to I heard a very engaging and informative speaker who touched on the topic of embracing who your child is instead of trying to change them. Here is a story she told about her family. They were traveling across the country speaking and she told her DH and 4 kids that they would have Mexican food when they stopped that night, everyone seemed noncommittal and fine with it (she has 3 boys and one girl all teens). That night as they drove in she spotted a seafood restaurant and said hey how about seafood. Everyone was excited about seafood except the daughter. It wasn’t that she did not like seafood but that she had been told they were having Mexican for dinner. Everyone else in the car teased her, told her to lighten up, go with the flow and all those kitschy sayings. It was only years later as the mother began to study how we learn that she realized she was not accepting her daughter for who she was, she was instead expecting her to go with the flow since that is the way the rest of the family was, easygoing and spontaneous.

The end of the story is a happy one with the mother accepting that she had a daughter that did not like change, did not appreciate spontaneity, liked things the way they were and such. The daughter has gone on to use all those gifts toward helping to build water supplies for third world countries where she applies her stick to it attitude and desire for organization and planning to benefit others (and herself).

I have to tell myself this story often in my head when Lela refuses to budge on the slightest things. She likes things the way she likes them, she likes things where she likes them and she likes to do things the way she likes to do them. I know in order for her to be successful she (and I) have to embrace these qualities that make her who she is and will enable her to become the successful adult she is destined to be.